Fifth Assessment: almost 8 months on this journey

      The moment was here....had I done enough in the past 6 weeks to reach the 14 pound goal that would bring my total weight loss to 100 lbs?  Triple digits...I never thought I would be even close to being able to say I've lost 100 pounds. I had warned Kyle that I would probably cry either way the scale went...if it was below 14lbs I'd be disappointed.  I would try to remind myself that any loss was a loss and I should be proud of that, but it would have been difficult.  If I reached 14 then I knew I would more than likely want to cry but it would be happy tears.  235 was the magic number......and I was at 231!!  I did it!!  I have lost 104 pounds!!  I cannot even begin to explain all that was going through my mind.  I fought back the tears because I didn't want to cry in front of my trainer and everyone else in the gym at the time,  now that I think about it what would it have mattered if I did shed a few tears.  It feels so good to be able to say I am PROUD of myself. I have worked hard, had ups and downs and am learning to celebrate the ups and fight through the downs.

January 2012

October 17, 2012

 

 

 

 

 

 I know I have posted the January 2012 picture in a previous blog but I was looking back through some of my entries and saw this picture.  I don't even recognize myself.  It's funny though, I don't really recognize the girl on the right yet either.   That's okay though, I like her a lot better than who I was in January even if I'm still trying to figure her out.

     My next big goal is to reach "one"derland.  It still amazes me to think that is definitely a possibility now.  I imagine I haven't been under 200 lbs since elementary school. I know in fifth grade I would come home crying almost every day because I was smart and fat so I was the fat ass teacher's pet, so if I wasn't over 200 lbs then I was certainly close.  I admit I was a little intimidated when Kyle told he wants me to reach "one"derland in the next 12 weeks.  My first thought was uh...Thanksgiving and Christmas are right around the corner.  But I'm going to go for it.  I'll just have to figure out what my must haves are for each holiday and let myself have a little (okay--I already know chocolate covered cherries and white fudge oreos--I'll just only buy one box of each instead of 5 or 6 and hide it from the other 2 in the house so I can actually have some of it).  I will make sure my workouts are a priority and be smart about the majority of my meals.  

    The other goal Kyle set for me is going to be a big challenge for me.  He wants me to do a presentation/talk with other people about what I'm eating, how I track and stay relatively consistent.  I love to write but public speaking on the other hand is not something I am good at.  When I'm writing I'm sitting at my computer in my pjs not in front of others watching me.  But one of the things I wanted to do when I started this journey was to hopefully inspire others to start their own journeys. Perhaps this is a way to help someone else know that success is possible even with all the ups and downs and the days when you either want to crawl back in bed or eat a pint of Ben and Jerry's ice cream (or both at the same time).

    I saw this quote today when I logged into facebook and I think it really shows where I am right now on my journey:

 

I'm not completely there yet but I've taken such huge steps, a little off balance at times but still moving forward.